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It’s Time For (More) Change – I Hit A Brick Wall

Today’s post was originally going to be about creating spontaneity in your life – something which, only last week, I was feeling.

Really feeling.

I was peaking with the repercussive energy of the partial solar eclipse, and I was embracing change. A lot of change. Now my soul wants even more change.

I hit a brick wall this weekend. A big, metaphysical, brick wall. A soul wall.

A wall I had bricked up.

For the first time in such a long, long time, I was met with that inextricably desolating feeling – I was trapped in my own body.

Now, I know when I’ve come to the end of the road, the edge of a cliff, or a crossroads in life. I intuitively know if I’ve strayed from the path. But I hit a solid wall, and when I turned around, there was another one. The path was gone.

I truly believe, that the Divine will intervene when we ask, and boy had I asked for it.

I am telling you this because, whether you are an empath like me, or you consider yourself a sensitive soul, there has been a culmination of current astrological events, collective consciousness templates, and our own soul journey’s, that have led me to this point – and today we have another global planetary moment, Solstice.

Summer Solstice

It is Summer Solstice here in the northern hemisphere, and Winter Solstice in the southern hemisphere, but it doesn’t matter where you are in the world, this is a global moment and we are all experiencing it at the same time.

Solstice is a planetary moment where the Earth's tilt reaches its zenith. It is a climax, a completion of this global cycle of growth.

Can you remember what you were doing last Summer Solstice? I sure can.

As soon as we reach this peak, the northern hemisphere begins its slow tilt away from the sun. That means, that every day from now, we (in the northern hemisphere) are gradually declining.

Everything is in a constant state of ebb and flow. The cycle never ends. Nothing ends, it only appears to.

The daughter of eden

This means our year is already beginning to end. 2021 has already reached its peak.

How many cycles like this are we going to repeat the same thing? how many years? The same patterns, coping mechanisms, habits.

When will what we have done, achieved, accomplished, ever be enough? When do we stop?

My brick wall(s) forced me to look at myself. At the way I have been living my life over the past year.

I thought back to a time where I felt most aligned, most connected. It was the summer of 2018. I chopped off all my hair, I was meditating daily, my diet was raw, healthy, I was practicing Kundalini yoga, reading self-development books, living the Law of Attraction, working with the Divine. I was in my own spiritual bubble – then it burst and my head metaphysically cracked wide open.

Me in 2018

When I compared all of that to how I live my life now, it’s no wonder I’ve reached a brick wall – and I thought I was trapped then.

I don't think we realise how often we lose our own identities due to people pleasing. 

Read that again.

So, what did I do when I hit that brick wall? I sat in the feeling, in the dark, I acknowledged the void, and I begged to wake up.

I know that a part of my journey involves me sharing my voice with the world. I have always known that. Whether that is through written word, or verbally. But I have stunted my own growth, and now God has made me face it.

It’s Time For Change

The type of content I want to create is changing – or rather, expanding. I want to expand upon the topics I’m already covering: philosophy, mindful living etc, and go deeper. I want to talk about the things that aren’t going to resonate with everyone, and that’s fine. If it’s for you, you’ll find it, or it will find you.

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings having a human experience.

the daughter of eden

And I want to write, create, and speak more about that.

If you are ready to dive deeper with me, then please let me know in the comments.

With all of this in mind, give some thought today about your own spiritual journey.

As always, I wish you a wonderful day and I hope to see you next time.

Love,

8 Comments

  • Christine
    June 21, 2021 at 9:12 am

    I will go on this journey with you, and I am sure it will take a great direction. I hope youโ€™ll feel attached to yourself again soon but hitting a brick wall might be a good start to be honest no matter how tough the realisation may have been. I also love your pixie hair โœจ๐ŸŒป๐ŸŒž

    Reply
    • Victoria
      June 22, 2021 at 8:42 pm

      Thank you Christine for joining me on this journey. ๐Ÿค๐ŸŒป You are right, hitting a brick wall was the re-balancing I needed for my internal equilibrium. Glad to have you along for the ride. ๐Ÿงš๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ

      Reply
  • Christine
    June 21, 2021 at 9:12 am

    I will go on this journey with you, and I am sure it will take a great direction. I hope youโ€™ll feel attached to yourself again soon but hitting a brick wall might be a good start to be honest no matter how tough the realisation may have been. I also love your pixie hair โœจ๐ŸŒป๐ŸŒž

    Reply
    • Victoria
      June 22, 2021 at 8:42 pm

      Thank you Christine for joining me on this journey. ๐Ÿค๐ŸŒป You are right, hitting a brick wall was the re-balancing I needed for my internal equilibrium. Glad to have you along for the ride. ๐Ÿงš๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ

      Reply
  • Perseo
    June 22, 2021 at 8:29 pm

    Dear Victoria,
    I’m ready to go on this journey with you! ๐Ÿ˜
    In life many walls will block us, some built by others, many others built by ourselves; but no wall is too big not to be climbed over, no wall is too strong not to be knocked down. Looking forward to reading your future posts!

    Reply
    • Victoria
      June 22, 2021 at 8:43 pm

      Thank you, Perseo! ๐ŸŒป Walls were made to be broken! I’m glad to have you along for the journey. ๐Ÿค

      Reply
  • Perseo
    June 22, 2021 at 8:29 pm

    Dear Victoria,
    I’m ready to go on this journey with you! ๐Ÿ˜
    In life many walls will block us, some built by others, many others built by ourselves; but no wall is too big not to be climbed over, no wall is too strong not to be knocked down. Looking forward to reading your future posts!

    Reply
    • Victoria
      June 22, 2021 at 8:43 pm

      Thank you, Perseo! ๐ŸŒป Walls were made to be broken! I’m glad to have you along for the journey. ๐Ÿค

      Reply

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